Still sick :(

Actually feeling sick enough to need to call my doctor's office to see if they can get me in today.  Feeling REALLY lousy - headache, chills, sore throat...blech.  Bad news?  I really don't feel like walking.  Good news?  I really don't feel like eating, either.

Feeling lousy

I was actually good over the weekend - stayed on points and managed to get more than 10,000 steps each day.  I managed to survive Saturday by having vegetables cooked in broth for lunch and having a sensible dinner.    I spent all weekend cleaning the upstairs and getting out the fall decorations.  Still need to winterize the outdoors and possibly stain the deck, but it feels like I'm rapidly getting ready for the autumn.  Need to switch out clothes, too - that will mean walking up and down the stairs a lot which will be good for my totals.

So why the "feeling lousy" title?  I have a nasty cold coming on - sore throat, chills, fever, muscle aches.  And a nasty headache.  And my lips feel numb - how weird is that?

Aside from the cold, starting to feel genuinely on track.  The house is "clean", we're eating right, the whole family is getting exercised...it's all good, right?  Now if we can keep our spending under control as the holidays approach, I will feel very good.  Money is always the last thing I seem to get handled.  Oh, well...baby steps, right?

Uh-oh...

It's funny.  I have been doing the WW thing for 3 1/2 weeks with little difficulty - I'm hungry and all that but I've still been able to stay on program pretty easily.  I can feel the trouble coming, however.  This morning I REALLY wanted McDonald's breakfast.  So I got an Egg McMuffin but I also got a hash brown.  That's 10 points for breakfast and I'm hungry already.  Time to focus - this is my first real hurdle - get through the weekend without going nuts.  Keep logging my food and try to get 10-15 activity points this weekend.  Let's do it!!!!

Friday Night

One of the things I hope to get from this weight loss is more energy.  By the time I get to the end of my week, I feel so exhausted I barely have energy to take a bath.  I did drop another 2.6# this week (grand total is now 11.2#) so I'm getting there.  Will try and write more later in the weekend - for now I'm going to take my tired self off to bed.  G'night!

Still plugging away...

Had my esophagram yesterday - what a singularly unpleasant test that is!  My stomach still hurts from all the barium.  But it means I can cross off another prerequisite for the Lap Band.   Still not completely sure that I want to do this but it is good to be losing again and having a lot of options available.

The pedometer challenge has only two consistent participants.  Want to broaden the field so I plan to invite some WW people and maybe even open it to anyone.  Still thinking on that one...

OCD? Too competitive? You decide!

So I did 12,000 steps today despite being at church until after noon and spending a couple hours cooking.  It helps to go on a long, brisk walk.  Who knew that was the secret to exercise?  Just getting out and doing it!!!

Busy, busy, busy!

Didn't quite get 12,000 steps but did get over 10,000.  Got the upstairs cleaned, all the bedding washed, laundry done, ironing and mending finished AND I cleaned the garage.  Plenty of activity and I ate very well so it was a very good day.  Now I am off to take a hot bath and crawl between crisp sheets.  Mmmmmm.
Next week is my first visit back to the doctor's office and I'm kind of excited to show off my progress.  I also have both my bloodwork and my esophogram this week.  Baby steps toward the ultimate goal of an insurance financed Lap Band.

Friday again

Down another 4.2# at weigh in yesterday.  Hooray!!  That's 8.6# in two weeks - not a pace I can maintain but it's a lot of fun for now!

Still getting the pedometer challenge fleshed out.  I've given it a Facebook group (Pedometer Challenge!!) and decided to provide the little incentives myself.  More to come on that front.  Hopefully my pedometer will get here today so I can join my own challenge...

Walk it off!

Today is weigh-in.  I will definitely post after that but I had a great idea I want to get out there.  Yesterday, as a reward for being on program for two full weeks, I bought myself a new pedometer.  It should come today...
The workout plan for Ruth and I will be a contest of steps - who can get in the most steps each day and we will keep a running tally of who wins each day.  Then, whoever wins the week will get some little prize or maybe just bragging rights.  Still thinking it through but I like it!!

Another weekend

The weekend went a lot better than I had any right to expect.  Friday night was uneventful although I was tired because I waited up for Nick (midnight) and then we talked for almost an hour.  Time spent talking with your teenager in wonderfully spent, even if it deprives you of sleep...
Saturday was the Cubs/Brewers tailgating party.  I must be getting old, because I had very little tolerance for people's shenanigans.I just wanted a quiet bus ride to the game, tailgating/talking followed by a good game.  The game was great (Cubs win!!) and I actually ate NO ballpark food.  I don't think I've ever been to a ballgame without having something.  I am quite proud of myself.
I still am not exercising enough (or really at all, unless I can count my running about the house as exercise, which I honestly cannot).  I think today I will have to squeeze a workout in over my lunch hour.  By nighttime, I'm just too tired to do much.  I'll try and post later...

Finally Friday...

Not sure why I'm looking forward to the weekend - I've got a lot of fun things planned but I don't expect to get nearly enough sleep.  Plus lots of food challenges ahead...

Weighed in yesterday at 272 - that's down 4.4# in my first full week on the program.  It is a good sign, but I always do well the first couple of weeks.  I does put me on track to be under 270 for my first recheck with Dave Finnergan.  That was the mini-goal I set ten days ago, so that much is very encouraging.  I am now thinking that maybe I could just do this with WW, no need for the Lap-Band at all.  Of course, every time I go back to the program I'm sure that this time I can stay with the program and get to goal.

If I get all the preliminary stuff out of the way I can review my options when January is closer and decide what I want to do.  I also want to discuss the entire matter with my oncologist and be sure he thinks it's a good idea. 

Ruth said she wants to workout with me - difficult since we live hundreds of miles apart but I think having someone to be accountable to will help.  Thinking about how to do this - maybe a challenge for most mileage?  Thinking about ideas for now.

I'd best get back to work...

Another Doctor appointment

Rich has an oncology appointment today at 3:10.  They found a suspicious area on his lung three months ago and have been following it on CT scans - today we hear if it's just scarring from the radiation and his tendency to aspirate OR if the cancer has spread to his lungs.  I was really unconcerned about this initially (Dr. Korkmaz thinks it's the former) but as the appointment looms I'm getting more scared. I can't imagine what Rich is feeling...

One week

Been back on WW for one week.  Feeling pretty good - managed to stay on program for the week pretty well, although I will confess that I've not been diligent about the whole grains, healthy oils, etc.  Focusing on portions and fruits/veggies - the rest will come later, I hope.  What is it they say?  If you do something for four weeks with consistency it becomes a habit.  Here's to three more weeks to a habit!

This week I want to make exercise my priority.  We have a late dinner tonight because Rich has a church meeting and Sam has soccer practice.  I could go to the Y after dinner or I can go use the elliptical for 30 minutes tonight instead.  I'll probably do the elliptical because it will take so much less time.  I do really want to get back to the Y because of the variety they offer but lack of time is a real barrier.  Sam starts swimming in two weeks - that's when I'll be forced to go down to gym again.  Want to get on the circuit trainer to work on toning.  Yesterday Rich and I went biking for geocaches - found two on a five mile ride.  It was an absolute blast and, although it definitely felt like exercise, it was really a good time.  I need to find more activities like that!

Back to work.  It's the day after Labor Day and that is a really busy day - should be able to keep my mind off food!

Happy Labor Day!

Still feeling down and out of sorts from working yesterday.  Rich and I are going shopping at Kohl's (I have $50 in Kohl's bucks I have to use up so I'm going to spend without spending).   Maybe  new blender?  Although their blenders are pretty cheap and I do want a nice heavy one.

Going to get the house clean and make a shopping list - those things make me feel better...

Still eating right - just need to get more dedicated to working out.  Need to mix it up, too.  Maybe I'll get back on the elliptical today - that's an excellent plan and a great workout.  Off to Kohl's for now.

Sunday sucked

Worked today - and it was really, really busy and really, really sad.  I really want to eat a lot of salty snacks...and drink a lot of alcohol.  It won't make the day any better but I would feel better for the couple of minutes I was eating it.  I know that looks crazy when I write it down but it's how I like to handle stress.  Instead I'll have a glass and a half of wine and head to bed.  

Yesterday I biked over 7 miles with Rich.  I'm getting back on track slowly...

Labor Day weekend

Feeling kind of reflective this morning.  When you are fat and constantly dieting, every holiday is a possible milestone.  I really can't count the number of times I've said "I will lose X number of pounds by this day (Labor Day, Christmas, New Year's, my birthday, etc.)" and have then gotten completely disheartened when I failed to make a ridiculous goal. 
Now I want to make my goal eating right and eating well and I'll let the weight come off when I get the surgery.  I still, however, am falling prey to the mental game of "I will lose 40 pounds by Christmas."   Which isn't all bad, unless I let the fact that I will not lose that much by that date get me in a bad head space.  THAT is the trap I am trying to avoid!
I wonder how many people fall into the same trap?

Weigh In Day

Went back to Weight Watchers today.  Weight was up to 276.4, but that wasn't a surprise after two days of doctor's appointments.  I have stayed on program for several days and am feeling pretty good about this beginning.  Would write more but I am sooooo tired.

Day two of the rest of my life...

Well, I stuck to program except no time to exercise today.  Did my exact number of points BUT I have been pretty much starving whenever I wasn't running around like a crazy person.

This is why I am looking forward to a possible lap band.  It is so hard to stay on plan when you feel hungry all the time so the idea that it could maybe take food off the front of my mind all the time is very encouraging.  I will still plan on WW, just adjuvanted with the lap band.